2 November 2026 at 7:06 PM
So, I haven’t been able to walk for most of today.
Everything has gotten worse. I’ve had uncontrollable shaking throughout my entire body, especially my legs.
When I first got up and came out to the living room, I was okay. The pain was bad, but I could still walk.
It wasn’t until I got up to go to the bathroom that my legs almost gave way beneath me. I managed to make it to the bathroom and then back to my room before the shaking became so bad that I literally couldn’t stand anymore.
Ever since then, around 11:30 AM, I’ve been experiencing uncontrollable shaking, full-body fits, spasms and have been unable to walk without assistance.
Both Merv and Luke have had to help me get to and from the bathroom, and Luke has even picked me up and carried me a few times. It’s been that bad.
It’s scary, I’m not going to lie.
If I genuinely thought going to emergency or calling an ambulance was going to help, I would. But right now, my gut is telling me there’s no point.
I think I’m going to call the hospital tomorrow and follow up on the extremely urgent referral Elean sent through on Friday afternoon, and ask them for advice.
Right now, I’m just trying to keep my mind off how bad I truly feel and focus on watching Dancing for the Devil on Netflix with Luke and Merv.
Please pray for me if you’d like, or send some good thoughts my way.
I just want to feel like me again.
Or better yet, I’d really like to feel good for the first time ever.
Love to you all ♡
A little note before I go…
I’m not going to lie, today is the closest I’ve come to calling an ambulance, and I really don’t like how I’m feeling.
Something is definitely not right. I know my body, and I’m very aware of how I’m feeling and the changes that are happening.
I’ve managed to get to the toilet a couple of times this evening using just my walking stick, with Merv and Luke staying close by in case I need help.
But I know something is wrong, and I’m taking it very seriously.
I’m keeping a record of all my symptoms as they happen, and I’ve reached the point where I genuinely don’t think I can tolerate anything more.
If things get even the tiniest bit worse tonight, I will call an ambulance. And if I continue feeling like this throughout the night and into tomorrow morning, I’ll call one then, too.
I promise I’m not taking any of this lightly. I just desperately want to feel better. ♡
Recorded: 2 November 2026 at 7:06 PM
Day of my video diary: 1769
Time since starting: 4 years, 10 months and 4 days (inclusive)
#LifesAStory #DailyVideoDiary #ChronicPain #HealthUpdate #LifeLately #ChronicIllness #MobilityIssues #WalkingDifficulties #MuscleSpasms #Shaking #HealthStruggles #LivingWithChronicPain #TrustingYourself
