It just hit out of nowhere. I have tried deep breathing, mindfulness, and being in the now, and nothing is seeming to work. I took a valuim hoping that would help, but it hasn’t. And now I’m in tears 😢

My friend has said it’s grief. That it can hit you out of nowhere and feels like anixety. I don’t want to feel like this. I want to get on with my day, but I feel paralysed by this feeling in my chest, making me feel like I can’t breathe. I just want it to stop 😣

This is why I’m not setting a date to leave. I have to try and be kind to myself. Hopefully, I will feel better soon 🙏

I just don’t know what to do with myself. I’m sitting on my bed with suction bags next to me to start packing, and yet I feel like even just moving from where I am is so much. It’s too hard. The physical sensations of anixety can be debilitating, and that’s how I feel right now 😭

If this is grief, I guess watching my psychology recording might help. Thankfully, my laptop is right next to me. And my liquid weed vapes. I am definitely not going out today 😔

Thank you for your support. I don’t know what I’d do if I couldn’t share 🥺

12:24 p.m.