I am so happy for the win at the end of the day after a sad and confusing start ☺️

I honestly don’t know how I manage to upset or anger people, especially those I feel like I’ve put before myself almost all the time 😔

I’m starting to think that more than anything else in my life, I need to accept that I am never going to understand how other people genuinely see me 🫣

More than anything in the world, I am looking forward to feeling free. Uni will be over. I have no intention of working at all, at least for some time. I need to heal. I am so far past exhausted on every single level that I can’t even stand up in the shower. I must sit in the bath with the shower on since my bathtub taps won’t turn on 🤨

But for some reason, getting to a state of “I give up; nothing’s ever going to be good enough for anyone, so why do I even bother?” and my intuitive immediate answer was “For me, I know I can do this, I want to learn.” It turns out I did need to get advice from my tutor, who also happens to be my ADHD coach for which he gave me excellent advice, and I got every practice question right due to feeling emotionless by this point 😐

Anyway, my food is ready, it’s 10:03 pm, and I don’t think I’m going to manage any more notes tonight 😴

Update: I am eating dinner but struggling at around halfway 😅 10:22 pm