I think all the anger and hatred towards myself for my entire life has turned into sadness. I don’t really know .

This feeling is so new. I don’t remember ever feeling like this before. This second shift within me has me seeing everything completely differently once again and as lovely as it is, and it is, it’s so new and unfamiliar.

I’ve never handled feeling unwell before and apparently, the feeling of wanting the love I love to be hers is engulfing me. As I stood in the shower, reliving having a bubble bath poured for me and being looked after when unwell was all I could feel. I’m human.

I don’t feel angry at myself anymore which is something but I still have a well full of emotions within me and they are coming out in all sorts of places. Like watching Netflix the past couple of days 🥹

Thankfully at least I am feeling ok about uni. I will book another tutoring session before submitting the last part of the big assignment 🤓