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Sometimes I guess you need to write something for someone else to really get it…
I have been scrolling through reddit since getting out of the bath/shower. I say it like this because for the first half I sat under the shower and let the bath fill up around me while I cried. . Thankfully I was able to actually wash my hair, shave, brush teeth, was face and body…
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The only thing I’ve truly wanted to do since going through my spiritual awakening is tell stories..
Guess I don’t need a bunch of fancy degrees to do that, do I. Though it’s definitely not the same.. I honestly thought going through an awakening like I have would stop these major dark deep intensely painful times from continuing to happen. Guess I really am just too far gone, stuck in the lower…
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I don’t understand why this is still happening…
Why can’t I connect to what I believe in Why is absolutely everything making me cry? Why can’t I hold onto knowing everything will be ok? I have been here too many times… I am 35 years old I have spent years working on myself.. But now I can’t help but notice that it will…
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I tried so hard not to.. I really did 😭😭
But instead I’ve just added more cuts and eventually scars to myself.. I was definitely kidding myself that I could help anyone 🤣 Time to go back to sleep
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I found my song list of songs ‘to say goodbye’ on my hard drive…
Since I can’t watch Netflix unless it involves getting out of bed and going into my very cold, very quiet, dark house, where I am all alone, with the voice in my head telling me of how much of a fuck up i truly am. and its strange you know, coz, i don’t actually hear…
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I feel so alone and can barely see from crying so much
So i’m sorry for all the mistakes there might be I feel like my world has been turned upside once again, and it wasn’t that long ago that that happened. And now all i can think about is Mr X telling me that everyone in his life believed he was a fuck up. his words.…
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There’s a lot of things that I have done wrong in my life.. but fucking with someone’s job is definitely not one of them…
I truly am in complete shock. I honestly don’t know how I will ever be able to even try to trust someone new in my life again. I honestly believed that I was meant to help people. That that is why I have to deal with so much shit. But I was wrong. Every single…
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I just want to stay numb.. I am beyond struggling
Trigger warning: talk of self harm, suicide, very emotional, I’ve definitely had a really bad day 🥺😭 What I believe in definitely does align with how I react to situations. Especially when I feel like I have been betrayed. Which is exactly how I feel. In fact the level of betrayal is far deeper in…
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The urges to cut are getting stronger…
I did what always happens to me in exams and froze.. didn’t even finish it. Had 70 multiple choice questions and 4 hours. Yet I guess heaps and still had roughly 7 or 8 questions unanswered. Just hit the submit button as the timer hit zero. I cried so much because I knew in that…
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My alarm is set for less than 4 hours 😫 Exam count down is on 🙌
I officially plan to sleep all of Thursday. It’s 3:28am 😬 My alarm is set for 6:50am 🥺 Every trimester I promise myself this won’t happen, yet, here I am again.. cramming for an exam 😅 Thankfully this time round I feel calm about everything. I mean, I did have a good cry earlier on…
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Life's A Story 