Grant has been and gone, since I obviously didn’t explain well enough that there are 24 hours to start and submit the exam. So, I wasn’t actually expecting him to arrive so early given it was before 9am and I was still sleeping 😴

I have not as yet started the exam, though I guess that’s obvious since I’m here writing this instead of doing the hundreds of other things I should be 😒

I’ve already had a cry and two valium since waking up, and of course my weed vape. It’s currently 1:25 pm on Tuesday the 14th of February 2023. It really is quite trippy even for me who smokes and vapes weed every day and never plan to stop, that not once have I ever considered doing it before an exam to help keep me calm..Or at least calmer 🤣 I would happily give up alcohol in an instant if for some reason I had to or wanted to, but weed on the other hand, I’m such a big advocate for it that I truly think more people should use it. Though once I’ve completed a few more degrees, which, if anyone is interested, I plan to apply for and do an honours degree as well as a masters and PhD, after taking a year off to focus on healing me.

Hahaha how funny is that really when you put that into context with how much this exam is fucking with me.

I sent my tutor an email asking if I could pay him to put the formula sheet together like we had planned to during my tutoring session on Friday, but as most of you know, I cried all the way through that, so it became more of a counselling session. Thankfully my tutor is like a gift from god and specialises in helping people with ADHD and learning disabilities.

I love how the Universe works like that. My Psychologist has been telling me for ages that I need to find someone who does ADHD coaching and now I have been introduced to someone who has already changed my life in sooo many ways. There really aren’t enough words to express how truly grateful I am for meeting him 😁

Now that I have finally spoken to my landlord, who has no idea why the address has changed and said it’s definitely not something he has done, as he didn’t even know about. He has confirmed that he doesn’t think any work will start on this house for at least this year which is fantastic news, because I really need to purchase all the bulk discounted rates I’ve finally been able to get my chiropractor to agree to, so thats awesome. I need to find out about the physio classes and what they cost. I think I’m going to look until getting a membership for the pools where the heated hydrotherapy pool is and hopefully on a mental and cognitive need basis, be able to buy a bulk number of sessions with my new awesome tutor/coach. He already provides discounted rates for people with concession pension cards so that’s cool. I just really want to buy in bulk so that I absolutely stick to some sort of routine which I currently have none of so I think that will be the very first time I need to figure out during my first ADHD session.

Well first with him, I had one earlier when I was first diagnosed with ADHD but it was horrible. Paying the amount I had to for something not even a little worth it put me off looking. Now the Universe has bought someone into my life who as I said is already doing so much for me. I think I might ask him if he wants to pick this fake name since it’s a given my “absolutely amazing gift from god” tutor is going to be mentioned throughout my stories.

Though as I stressed to him, I have no intention of actually discussing our sessions but I obviously talk about my day and sometimes other people need to be mentioned for the story to make sense 😅

Omg I am clearly procrastinating. I just have no hope for this exam 😑😮‍💨