I literally pray at every intersection I stop at that my car keeps going, to give some perspective on how much I need a new vehicle 😅🚗

I have been preparing myself since July 2022 (it’s the 11th of February 2023 at 12:49 pm right now) that I will probably be moving into my wagon for awhile while looking for my new home, whenever that time comes. I have absolutely no idea when that might be since I have never met the new owners and they have only ever replied to the very first message I sent confirming that I had received their letter in the post and updated the payments for my rent with their new details. I have messaged a few times since then asking for any new information but they ignore me.

Anyway, I want to thoroughly go through absolutely everything that I own and just overhaul the lot of it.

Hmm I have just remembered the video I made yesterday regarding my motorbike and solarium and putting them into storage while I look for a new home, but thankfully in this moment can see the solution to what I had for just a second thought might be an issue lol…

University is driving me absolutely insane at the moment. This statement is 100% true. But I love it far more than I guess maybe I forget to remind myself. Plus since my tutoring session last night turned more into helping me breathe and working through why I’ve been in the shocking state I’ve been in, (my tutor is honestly a saint!) he was able to help me pull back and see my degree in the bigger picture sense.

Ironically, of course, this is how I see everything else except when it comes to me and my life.

Anyway, back to my point, I have decided that buying a campervan is the perfect solution when it comes to being notice to move.

I have no intention whatsoever to apply for another degree until I have had at least six months, maybe even a year off. I need to heal. I truly am shattered into so many fractured parts, and each one has a different perspective when it comes to the world we live in. Moving to a Buddhist meditation sort of place is what keeps coming to mind since I clearly need to learn how to breathe better. Deeper. More than anything I would love to truly love to learn how to stay calm. Because if you’ve seen any of my recent videos you’ll know I’m not very good at it right now.

So campervan to move into so I can just be me and be free to dive deep within myself to learn how to put myself back together. Which of course will all be shared with you along the way.

But I do plan to return to university. When I do, that’s when I’ll start looking for a new home. I realise this is the best thing for me to do, and well, truth be told, a lot of this is coming to mind as I type this, but it’s just hit me that so much of what I own is so old, stained or damaged that most of it will either go to goodwill or hard rubbish. So, at least I’ll only need storage for basically the two things I own that I never want to depart with.

I’m going to start looking now I’ve decided. Gives me something else to think about when needing a break.

So far today, I made pancakes for breakfast. Folded and put away the washing that was on the clothes horse while I preheated my solarium. But I hadn’t quite finished folding the clean washing when I was hit with severe nausea out of nowhere. I took some medication for it and managed to hang the clean clothes on the clothes horse but nausea kept getting worse so I lay down for 10 or so minutes on my bed until I felt better. By this time I had decided against tanning since the time was ticking by and I still have so much to do before my exam on Tuesday. Unfortunately, when I got up again to get dressed nausea came immediately straight back. I’ve been feeling like this for over a week now. Maybe that’s why I’m listed as critical on the waiting list for the hospital. 30 degrees in Melbourne isn’t helping how I feel.

So, it’s now 1:27 pm on Saturday and I’m lying on my bed with my laptop and notes next to me. All the curtains are shut and the evaporative cooling is on, but I just feel shit. Hence, looking at campervans on gumtree and writing this instead of looking at what I need to be doing given the exam is on Tuesday and the group chat has been going nuts about how difficult the practice one is.

So, on that note, I guess I better get stuck into it. At least I can do this in a more chilled setting because I just can’t stand sitting at my desk for another day in a row.

P.S: if you know me in real life please feel free to let me know if you happen to see or hear about a vehicle that might be worth checking out.

Update: so they appear to be very expensive lol guess I’m starting my search early 😅