As soon as I walked through my front door, the tears came. It’s this overwhelming feeling of isolation. Of being totally alone and knowing its all my fault.

I didn’t ask to be different. To be treated differently than everyone else. I’m nearly 37 and all I do is cry. Every damn day.

I am filling my pillbox once again. It feels like time doesn’t work right. How am I doing this again already ?!?

I have so much uni work to do but it’s almost impossible to take anything in when crying like this. Just typing this is taking so long.

I have my last psychology appointment this afternoon and am already trying to tell myself I’ll be ok with only half the sessions available next year. But given how often I have cried and how much it’s breaking me, I’m scared I’m just kidding myself .

Anyway, I’m still crying but have to finish filling the stupid pillbox. The last few days like today make me question why Ii bother taking medication at all, given I’m still completely alone 😥😢😭