I had to leave the Toastmasters Club I was attending as a guest during the break because of how bad my pain was.

I feel sad and embarrassed but mostly just upset and angry that I can’t even manage a full day of events.

Tomorrow is the opera and I want to feel as good as possible during it. I still haven’t worked out what I’m going to wear or if there is suitable parking or if I have to train into the city which I really don’t want to do given the time it finishes and how busy the trains will be.

I think I’m going to set a slightly later alarm for tomorrow because right now every part of me feels like I’m about to break down into tears and yet I’ve cried so much lately, it’s like they have all dried up.

So I am going to smoke a joint that I pre rolled before I left to hopefully help bring my pain levels down and help me start feeling better.

To end on a good note though, I had a great shift with my support client so I’m really happy about that.

Goodnight everyone 💞

9:07 pm