I think I am going to start actively using my solarium again ☺️


I paid so much money for it when they were first banned in salons in Australia. At first, I and I think the majority of people, at least everyone I’ve ever spoken to about it, all believed they were illegal in every way back when the ban came into place on the 1st of January 2015.

Thankfully this was not the case. It is perfectly legal to own a solarium in the privacy of your own home for personal use. You are just not allowed to rent them out or charge/accept money for others to use them. Makes sense given that’s why they were banned in the first place.

Back in 2015 when the ban first came into effect there was a huge underground market for people looking for others who own their own solariums. This I became aware of very fast, though I knew that would be the case. There are even secret codes that people use when either looking or offering the use of them. Neither of which I am going to share for obvious reasons.

I used to use it say approximately three times a week for 20 minutes each time until I established the tan I wanted and then one or two times a week to maintain it. I also regularly get skin cancer checks and use the bed as safely as possible.

So many people have said to me “if I owned a solarium I would use it every single day” to which I would always reply “so you’re part of the reason they were banned for public use and asking for skin cancer?”.

Some people just don’t get that tanning every day, even sometimes twice a day, which is another thing people have told me they would do, is seriously dangerous.

Since owning my solarium for the past almost 8 years, I have met two types of people, those who absolutely love it, want one themselves and beg to use mine, or those who think I’m the dumbest person alive. The second type crack me up if I’m totally honest.

But for anyone out there whoeither knows me in person or has seen my videos, you will know that I am very pale these days. I haven’t used the solarium in so long.

I think I make it something bigger in my head than it actually is. Like walking Boss I have realised. Using the solarium not only gives me a nice tan but it also very much helps lower my pain levels, which was a big factor in buying it in the first place.

Though for years I couldn’t understand or figure out why I find it so uncomfortable lying in it. Turns out it’s because of my warped shoulders being uneven.

It’s 11:37 am on Australia Day the 26th of January 2023 right now. So far I have had pancakes for breakfast, emptied everything from underneath Sebastian’s old enclosure, and had it picked up by some awesome people who rescue and adopt animals that people can no longer care for and they are constantly looking for more enclosures. I am so happy it has gone to a good home.

Anyway, I really do want to do whatever I can to help myself and stop making everything bigger in my head than it needs to be. I think this is all connected to having ADHD and quite frankly it fucking sucks.

But on top of wanting to lower my pain levels, I want my tan back. I always use sunscreen when I’m outside in the sun along with covering up as often as I can. In all fairness, I barely go out in the sun when it’s hot since the heat here in Australia is beyond what my Kiwi self can always manage. I have always preferred spring and winter over summer and rainy days will always be my favourite.

I woke up sweating and drenched so I ripped off my pjs to jump in the shower after letting Boss out when he woke me at approximately 9:30 am I think. But I was so exhausted, I knew it would be unsafe to shower in that state due to the risk of falling.*

So I had a coffee and caught up on the news on Google. Then I used the last of the pancake mix I had in the fridge to make breakfast and had them and another coffee. As most of you will know, due to the daily medication, I have to eat before taking my morning meds, which I did after breakfast. I had started reading a story on the nosleep Reddit forum with breakfast and wanted to finish it before jumping in the shower. I also had people coming to pick up the enclosure which I needed to empty everything from underneath it and quickly vacuum the laundry, which was desperately in need for it. I thought I was doing ok for time but had this feeling that the people were going to arrive early.

I had just finished emptying everything, mind you, still naked under my dressing gown when I got the message asking if they could come early since it hadn’t taken them nearly as long as they thought it would to get to my place. I said sure and they said they would be here in 10 minutes. I quickly threw on some clothes, vacuumed the laundry as fast as I could and moved my car out of the way so they could back in.

Thankfully, they were absolutely lovely people who were able to get it into the back of their van easily. It turns out the guy is an electrician, and they are going to overhaul the enclosure and make it like new completely. I have asked them to send pictures once it’s finished. I’m looking forward to seeing how it looks when they do.

In the meantime, I am sitting on my couch with Boss, wondering why I don’t feel more awake and focused than I do, given I finally sorted out my pillbox last night and have gone back to putting two Ritalin in my morning meds.

I have so much to do, like always. Uni is the top priority of course but I still very much need to finish my house work, vacuum , mop, change my sheets, mop, pick up dog poo, mow the lawns, though at the rate I’m going, I doubt I’ll get that done in time before Andrew needs his lawn mower back, and now that I’m thinking about it, my driveway has these new weeds growing that I’ve never seen before that need to be sprayed, though again, Andrew said I’m better off mowing them first before spraying them with weed killer, and well, just writing all that is enough to make my mind want to shut down. Oh and I have an incredibly important letter that I need to write a basic draft for to send to my doctor and psychologist that I need them to fill I’m asap and am running out of time as the deadline is so close, but for whatever reason, everytime I try I just go blank. So, that’s adding to the overwhelming stress of trying to get everything done without any help while my pain levels and exhaustion continue to increase, all while lowering the dosage of my pain meds.

Fuck me, its already 12:17 pm.

**Fun fact, I am not supposed to live in a house that has a shower over a bath, as it adds to the risk of falling. Not am I supposed to shower first thing in the morning or last thing at night for the same reason. Once, about 15-odd years ago, I was showering where I lived, which had the same set up as my current home, though the bath was bigger in that house, but, anyway, I did fall. I ripped open my back as I fell into the taps behind me and smashed the door and tiles in my attempt to stop myself from falling. It didn’t work, obviously. From that moment onwards, I have taken it very seriously when it comes to having a shower that I am not overly exhausted. I am becoming more at risk of falling every day these days, and the last thing I need is to add falling in the shower to the list of things I’m currently trying to deal with.

I seriously don’t feel like the Ritalin has kicked in at all, so I’m going to have to take one for lunchtime now. Since I have gone back to two in the morning, I still have three for during the day. I can either take two now and the last one at 4 pm, or one now, one at 2:30 pm and the last one at 4-4:30 pm. Since I still don’t know what works best, I’m going to try the second option today.

My special consideration for my uni quiz was granted which is good, meaning I still have a shot at catching up and doing ok with this stats unit. I just have to do the work.

But since it’s just me and I obviously have no plans for this public holiday, I have decided it makes more sense to start what needs to be done, and since uni is the most important, I plan to clean and vacuum one room at a time during the breaks I take from studying. This way at the end of the day, I can use my solarium and then have a nice hot bath. Oh and what’s even better is I now have that cool new showerhead that I can take down and use in the bath. Perfect for washing my hair and anything else I see fit to use it for 🤭😉

Publishing at 12:33 pm. Told you all everything takes me so long these days. I don’t even know if the grammar is correct but I can’t truthfully be bothered to check right now 😅


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