I mean that’s the only thing I can think of that could be why all of a sudden I have too much trauma.
If that was it, at least that would make sense. But the only reason I haven’t called the taxation department to query about it, is because of my friendship with Nichele and Pedro 🤷♀️
Anyway, yes it is obviously still playing on my mind. I feel ike that is pretty natural. Yet, the craziest part is, just like I packed all my stuff up at my sisters before ending up needing to leave, I knew this was coming. I not only felt it but actually questioned her about it. She just lied.
Ah well.. my food is nearly ready so that’s good. I am proud of myself as crazy as that may seem. But to be standing in my kitchen, almost finished making myself dinner, a few hours out of getting that message, which, I guess felt even more hurtful having been lied to about it just days ago, is truly a magnificent thing for me.
I may cry again. In fact I probably will. But I will get through it. I know I will.
UPDATE: It’s 7:04pm on Easter Monday and I have just realised that it has to be this. She had said yesterday morning that she was seeing the kids and family. The woman who runs the resuce is family, as she is the twin sister of Pedro’s son’s wife. So, they have obvsioulsy seen each other and I was bitched about.
At least that makes sense. Now I realise how much pain and tears I felt and cried were on people who are not people I even like. Fake people piss me off. Only problem is that almost everyone is fake. This world makes me mad and sad and then angry. At least I know that there is not one damn thing I would have done differently. I was me. I am me. I am real. I would rather be dead than fake ever again. So, I really am better off. I am very much the sort of person who can pack up my stuff and move far away and never talk to another soul in person again. Was all obvsiously meant to be. Jusst wish to fuck I didn’t have to go through absoutle fucking hell every single time some bullshit like this happens. Guess that’s why right now, I’m feeling pissed off. And sad.